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воскресенье, 14 января 2018 г.
<< the reason why eiswein wilder 13:29:40
­­­­­­I gotta find myself, gonna find it now­­­­­­I’m gonna say goodbye . You didn’t see me cry

­­­­­­­­ ­­­­­­

My heart is devastated. No, not because something terrible is happened. It's all in the emotion. I tried for so long to be a good girl. I read a lot, did homework, studied perfectly. I remember that sweet charming lady, where I was a years ago. Every morning, I woke up from the mother's voice calling for Breakfast. I had 15 minutes to get ready after I sat down at the table with my parents and discussed plans for the day. I always tied my long blonde hair into a ponytail. This is the most simple and easy hairstyle. Went to class. At school I was waiting for the best friends who swore to be beside me always, forever. (Never promise what you can't keep.) I was very happy. Everything was perfect. Then there was prom. College and new people. The old life was past, as my best friends. But it's not so bad, right?! I find new friends. Lived in Dorm for two years and was very pleased. This taste of freedom, independent life in any way is beyond words. I love my parents, but sometimes they were just unbearable! I was happy to breathe deeply and to lived my own live.
At some point you become blind. Can't see who your friend is, who the enemy is. You live the illusion of reality. And when the eyes are opened it's too late. The perfect life was shattered. I don't believe in fairy tales with a happy ending. And this is not a pessimistic tirade about poor, poor girl. This is the story of life. At some point we grow up. Something or someone breaks us. We cease to see the illusion and begin to feel the reality. Reality sucks. I don't feel free. Only more cornered. I can scream, hiss, scratch and bite. This is all I have. Cigarette smoke is my best friend. It helps to clear the mind and kill the pain inside.

Категории: Wild, Usefull, Think about it, Relationships, Redemption, My life, I'm so f/cking tired
вторник, 16 мая 2017 г.
burn in hell eiswein wilder 09:59:54
It's time to set the record straight. I'm not angry anymore. It became easier for me. I feel I'm free. And even those small difficulties that are in front of me can't break me. I have become stronger. I know exactly what you want. At first I wanted revenge. Wanted to make him suffer. Wanted him to feel crappy and humiliated as I felt. But then I realized that I will never be able to get him to feel it. Not because I didn't have the strength, but because such scum as he is not able to feel pain. And the real bitterness of the loss he will feel after. I truly believe that God is there and he is watching over all of us. I sincerely believe that this bastard will be rewarded for what he did, but not me. God's punishment is and she is not to Dodge. I just need to wait until his time comes. And then I'll stand and watch as he burns in Hell.

Категории: Be strong, Wild, Phoenix, Redemption, Freedom
суббота, 6 мая 2017 г.
you paranoid eiswein wilder 21:51:57

­­­­­­I’m good, I’m good, I’m great
­­­­­­Know it’s been a while, now I’m mixing up the drink
­­­­­­I just need a girl who gon' really understand
­­­­­­I just need a girl who gon' really understand


Подкаст TheWeekndPartyMonste­r.mp3 ( 04:09 / 9.5Mb )

Категории: I'm good, Faith, My life, Quote, Wild
понедельник, 20 февраля 2017 г.
<< i like poison in you, i'm sorry eiswein wilder 22:51:46
­­ ­­ ­­ ­­

I still feel myself alone. As I sit alone in the dark. I inhale the poisonous smoke. I'm smoking and still feeling numb. I drank bottle of champagne by myself. In that moment some people which call themself my friends texted me something like this: ''Bae, we have a party. Come..we missed you. Come if you want''. What the fvck?! What the holly hell is that supposed to mean?! I might have go wild. I might have this fvcking fun with them. Because I need my friends. I love my friends, even if they just sons of b/tches. Guess, I'll have one more one night stand, because I'm better being not completely alone. It's don't supposed anything. Just usefull. They use me. I use them. And in that case we some kind of friends. What's the point of getting drunk with people who fvcking retarded? I have fvking amazing mood and this is the best that ever happened to me in recent months. So you should fvck off for today. Because I want feel wild. Freedom. Liberty. Everything. I'll remember you when I need something from you. You can text me if you need something from me.

Категории: Poison, Wild, Freedom, Friendship, Usefull


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